Jesus Christ Vampire Hunter (2001) Reviews

• Wow, a B-Movie that's actually a B-Movie!

  sami-182003-10-25

  It's great to see a low budget b-movie that actually looks and feels like a real B-movie! The genre has become so artificially popularized and 'fetishized' that most recent low budget films have seemed more like relatively capable ventures trying to 'appear' as b-movies. I always felt the overall cinematic incompetence of b-movies was a result of poor financial and technological resources available to the filmmaker. Today the idea of a consciously manipulated shaky digicam is considered to be 'low-tech'. How pretentious! Sorry, I just don't have the ability to reconcile the inherent academic quagmire of the high-tech/low-tech dichotomous relationship that is today's modern b-cinema. Any filmmaker can now pretend to be Orson Welles or Roger Corman rather than find himself forced to follow one or the other due to his vision and associated resources. So how does this all preface a review of "Jesus Christ Vampire Hunter"? Well, here's a grungy little film that never finds a slick moment and something about that is really satisfying. The acting, camera-work, sound, editing, lighting, dubbing and just about every other cinematic component is raw and unrefined... and this is precisely the kind of film they intended to make! All the members of this film - director Demabre, writer Driscoll, the actors, the vampires, the zombies, the lesbians, the corpses, the atheists, the bystanders, the props, the locations - seem to be complicit in the joke. Everyone seems to be having a great time just trying to commit this crazy idea to film. But should you actually see this film? If you grew up watching b-movies, and aged into understanding what the genre is all about, then you'll easily sink into this little bloodlust and likely soil yourself by the end credits. If you recently discovered b-movies because of some oblique connection to Quentin Tarantino and a brief sitting through the 'Blair Witch Project' you'll think it's far too low-brow and a waste of good film stock - not to mention being embarrassed in front of your beret-wearing, gitannes-smoking, art-house friends for seeing such a film. "Jesus Christ Vampire Hunter" is a riot from beginning to end. Like many of it's great predecessors ("A Polish Vampire in Burbank" comes to mind) it's an ironic, creative, cliched genre experiment wrapped up in a consciously handicapped final package. Phil Caracas, who plays Jesus, has the kind of hardened gristled features we've seen on the faces of actors like Gary Oldman and Bruce Campbell. Like Campbell, Caracas never falters with his role - he remains in character and truly projects the necessary determined, single-minded missionary/militant slayer attitude throughout. This no-name actor is actually very good! Unlike Campbell though, Caracas only appears to be about 5'2" tall, but that somehow adds an even greater depth to his character's anger! The kung-fu sequences are surprisingly well conceived and executed for such a film. The action is always hilarious and, as viewers, we're constantly aware that the actors are just barely fulfilling the required stunt choreography. One can imagine the director shouting, "Cut! That's good enough. We'll just have to go with that and fix it in editing!" But in this film even the editing phase is likely to be a clunky non-fix. Classic! Most memorable are the scenes of Jesus using drum sticks and pool cues to kill vampires in a jazz club, and a daylight vampire battle in a park where real families can be seen picknicking and playing in the background. A true b-movie cares not for silly protocol such as securing a proper location shoot! Find this film... somewhere... watch it, and poop your pants!

• Behold his Glory!

  Pope-112003-03-23

  Jesus returns to fight an army of lesbian vampires, atheists, and mad doctor and a confused white guy. Helping him are Mary Magnum and El Santos, the Saint of the Wrestling ring. A mix of funny characters and ridiculous fight scenes make this one of the coolest movies on the planet. If your into weird, sacrilegious humor, this movie is for you!

• Jesus Christ Vampire Hunter: Jesus........With VAMPIRES!

  DjFelix2005-05-25

  JCVH is possibly one of the greatest examples of great movies that suck. JCVH is an awesome movie for this reason. True fans of film and people who have been at the bottom of the game understand what a hassle it can be to work without a budget. This film has some of the cheesiest effects that i've seen, but that is where it scores it's major points. With it's unbelievable amount of originality it's hard to understand how anyone could not want to see this movie. Most cynical reviewers will attack it's lack of 5 star acting, or it's lack of big budget effects, but the true deciding factor in a real fan of cinema's eyes is heart. This movie was scrounged together (For those of you who actually took the time to watch the special features on the DVD) and yet it was a huge favorite at many a film festival. This movie deserve much more credit that it is given, and I am going to see that it gets it.

• Great comedy in this low-budget indie feature!

  jluis19842006-05-02

  One cannot expect a serious film with a title like "Jesus Christ Vampire Hunter", but even when this low-budget b-movie delivers nothing but laughs, it still has an interesting point and an important message behind its blasphemous wackiness. It is definitely a comedy that replaces budget with brains and successfully transcends its own limitations delivering great entertainment. The plot is certainly as bizarre as its title: the lesbians of Ottawa are the victims of the increasing population of vampires that seems to be focusing only in them. A group of young Catholic priests become aware of this and have asked the Catholic church for help, but the church doesn't want to help them because it doesn't want to get involved with homosexuals. The priests call their last resource, Jesus Christ (Phil Caracas) himself, who decides to come back to the world to help the lesbians and to prove that homosexuals should not be ignored by the Church. The movie is a weird mix of good slapstick and well-written irreverent comedy, as it is probably the only movie where Jesus sings, smashes atheists with Kung-Fu moves and receives the aid of Mexican wrestler "Santo" (named "Santos" and played by Jeff Moffet). Independent filmmaker Lee Demarbre and writer Ian Driscoll create a wacky ride of action, horror and comedy in a charming way that one can't help but love their take on Jesus. Phil Caracas is superb in the role of the messiah and carries the film over his shoulders with grace. His performance is very good, and even when his character has to use modern clothes, he still makes a believable Jesus. Caracas definitely has a bright future as a comedian. Maria Moulton plays Mary Magnum, an agent who is decided to help Jesus in his fight against the vampires. She probably is the best of the cast and her character is not only pretty, but also probably a very meaningful one. Jeff Moffet as Santo is very funny and while his portrayal of the legendary wrestler is a humorous one, it serves to prove the influence of Santo in horror films. Probably many will be offended by this movie, however, the movie stays true to real Jesus' message of peace, love and understanding. It is an intelligent critic to the homophobic attitude of the Christian religion (specially the Catholic branch) with clever references to the biblical stories and a healthy dose of good humor. The budget constrains really hurt the film but it is admirable how far the crew went despite their limitations. With a clever use of edition barely manages to "cover" the low-budget problems but still, those problems just add charm to the whole image of "Jesus Christ Vampire Hunter". While the film is by no means perfect, it is a very good effort by these filmmakers. "Jesus Christ Vampire Hunter" may not be attractive for those expecting well-done acting and effects, but it will please the crowd eager for independent films with more heart than budget. Hopefully in the future the crew behind this small indie masterpiece will receive enough support to create bigger and better films than this. 7/10. Very Recommended.

• Now here's a good religious movie!

  jmanovcanada2005-10-21

  This certainly was a B movie, you can tell that the budget was very small. It is quite surprising what they managed to accomplish with so little. I find it ironic that many of the blockbuster Hollywood pushes out these days are almost unwatchable despite huge multi million dollar budgets. I would say that before watching this movie I probably couldn't have named a B movie, but I'm glad I saw this one. The special effects and fighting are pretty terrible but, that gives it a lot of it's charm and makes for a really funny watch. I guess it could depend on your sense of humor but, I thought it was a really funny movie, well worth watching at least once.