Mortuary Academy (1988) Reviews

• Rare Gem

  KillMe6662002-11-12

  I saw this film for the second time recently and realised how lucky I was to get that chance. I picked it up in a crummy second-hand shop amongst layers of crap and paid 50p - bargain I'd say! The film is about the brothers Grim who will inherit a mortuary if they pass there mortuary exams(!), unfortunately for them the current owners (Paul and Mary) don't feel like leaving anytime soon and plot to fail the brothers Grim however good they do in class. Oh yeah, Paul is a closet Necrophilliac, and Mary is an out-of-the-closet whore. There are some really fun parts in this film; mainly the classroom scenes where we get to meet the other classmates including that guy who always plays a psycho, if you get to see this you'll know who I'm talking about. In this film he plays a psycho. It's sad to note that many have passed away since the making of this film, especially Wolfman Jack who will be sorely missed. I recommend this film to any lover of cheese, and eighties type movies. If you are broadminded and don't dismiss films such as 'Porky's' and 'Nerds' as trash (which they surely are not!), then you'll do alright with this.

• Paul and Mary strike again...

  merklekranz2006-12-14

  Though nowhere as original as "Eating Raoul", for those who admire that film, "Mortuary Academy" is the closest Paul Bartel and Mary Woronov ever came to duplicating that magical black comedy. If you throw out "Mortuary Academy's" absurd "Radio Werewolf" dead rock band resurrection, you are left with some outrageous dialog, especially relating to Bartel's virginal dead lover. The film does rely on some "Airplane"- type hit or miss humor, however when the campy humor gives way to black comedy, these two (Bartel and Woronov) really deliver. I rate this a solid 6.0. Comparable ratings would include "Eating Raoul" 8.0, "Chopping Mall" 5.0, and "Lust in the Dust" 5.0. - MERK

• Another cult classic with Mary Woronov (spoilers).

  vertigo_142005-10-17

  Mary Woronov had (and probably not coincidentally) a habit of showing up in a number of strange b-grade (and sometimes lower) cult classics. Some good (Eating Raoul, Rock N' Roll High School), some so bad they're good (like Terror Vision), and some that were just out and out awful. Mortuary Academy is laden with obvious jokes and puns, mostly tasteless humor, and unfortunately was hard for me to wade through patiently until at least the last forty minutes or so. But understandably, this is the kind of material that makes a cult classic, appreciated by a few who find something pleasing enough about it to watch it ad nausea. I'm not quite sold on it as much, but I do like quirky films like these, and at least for this one, a horror comedy to some degree with emphasis on lame jokes and pure corniness (but certainly not in a family-movie kind of way). Mortuary Academy is the story of two brothers who are written as the next-of-kin to inherit their late uncle's mortuary, but only on the condition that they pass Mortuary Academy in order, at least as their lawyer explained it, develop an appreciation for the craft of a business which they may soon be running themselves. Of course, they are imbibed in an odd selection of classmates (naturally) and rebuffed by the two current heads of the mortuary (Mary and Paul, not coincidentally played by Mary Woronov and Paul Bartel), who initially plot to keep the brothers Grimm (for real) from successfully completing the conditions of the will, sure that if they did, Mary and Paul would be no longer be in charge. Regular fans of b-movie cult classics are advised to at least give this one a try. Besides b-movie cult regulars Mary Woronov and Paul Bartel look for Tracey Walter (of Repo Man fame) as Mortuary Academy's 80s variation on Dr. Frankenstien (which made for at least an more interesting ending to an otherwise relatively lukewarm movie overall).

• Absolute Garbage

  writtenbymkm-583-9020972017-06-04

  Whenever I think about Paul Bartel and Mary Woronov I remember Eating Raoul. That was a rather strange black comedy, not the greatest comedy in the world by any means, but at least well written and well acted. So when I found Mortuary Academy with Paul and Mary (and Tracy Walter, another of my favorites), I thought, well, it sounds pretty stupid, but it can't be that bad, right? Wrong!!! This is one of the worst pieces of absolute garbage I've ever seen. Most of the actors have no talent. The script is a disaster. Worst of all, it's not even remotely funny. The jokes (so-called) are on the level of very ignorant grade-school boys. If you gathered up a bunch of third-grade morons and told them to make a comedy, this is probably what you'd get. At some point I just gave up and stopped watching.

• Who thought necrophilia would be this Funny? (It wasn't really)

  Bill3572009-07-15

  One thing I never thought I'd see was Paul Bartel having passionate sex with a corpse. Thanks to this film, that which I thought impossible has become reality and I don't think I'll ever be able to close my eyes again without seeing the sight of a topless pot-bellied Bartel atop a beautiful dead teenage girl on the beach with his lips locked onto hers. Believe me when I tell you that this sounds funnier than it really was. This movie is one long, tasteless, and painfully unfunny necrophilia joke. However, there are some sporadically amusing moments A great cast is mostly wasted. Perry Lang continues (after The Hearse) his lustful pursuit of older women, only this time with more success, while Christopher Atkins tries hard and fails to fully explain why he's even in this movie. Caesar Romero and Wolfman Jack are here to collect a paycheck. Tracy Walter, Mary Waronov, and the rest do try hard. The best performance is that of Stoney Jackson as the token black guy, who manages to be the funniest thing in this movie despite his lamentable rapping skills. I'll give Mortuary Academy some credit though. I didn't hate it and it has perhaps the strangest Bar Mitzvah scene ever attempted in a motion picture.